Inner Child Work

The emotional damage that happens as a rule (rather than exception) to western humans because of the estranged and abusive ways we consider 'normal child-rearing' has deep and lasting consequences, which then drive a lot of our adult 'decisions' & being standard then pass as 'normal behaviour'.

John Bradshaw: Heal Your Inner Child

Bradshaw (see his page in wikipedia) is an early pioneer for Inner Child work, having worked first with addictions, realizing that chronic shame is at the root of all addiction, then discovering that doing inner child work (most effectively as group-work) in his practice was very effective to overcome both.    

Here he describes the theory and practice of this work, with some very useful practical excercises anyone can do.    

Here is a longer play-list all about his Inner Child work, which includes these.

Vídeo de YouTube

Vídeo de YouTube

Vídeo de YouTube

Vídeo de YouTube

Frozen Needs

In Re-evaluation Co-counselling, the concept of 'frozen needs' emerged, after decades of many people doing a lot of counselling work, as a useful way for explaining the irrational adaptations to not having had very basic needs met during childhood.

Most search for 'real love', our 'soul-mate', and many couple behaviours we consider normal in western culture (like jealousy, posessiveness, codependency in general...) we eventually figured out are attempts at 'filling frozen needs' ... which are, in fact, un-fillable.

As Bradshaw concluded, apart from learning how to 'parent one-self', the crucial work to be done is the discharging the pain of never having had such basic needs met as a child (what he calls 'doing the feeling work', and 'not letting the child be in the driving seat').

See selection of articles in by searching for 'frozen needs'.

Soul Loss

"Indigenous people have known about the occurrence of Soul Loss for millennia, and understand it as the result of an inner fragmentation caused by unawareness, a traumatic experience, or, an intense shock to the mind and body.

When we experience Soul Loss, a part of our Soul – or living essence – ‘hides’ or shuts away, hindering us from expressing and experiencing our true potential and wholeness as human beings.  Often times entire aspects of our psyches are completely blocked out or repressed.

While for many of us Soul Loss may sound uncomfortably familiar, this experience is usually temporary, and with the proper Soul Work these lost elements of ourselves can be reintegrated into our lives."

See how this relates to Inner Child Work in this article:

There's a dialogue related to this page in the Integral Permaculture FB group (click icon to go there)

There's a dialogue in our FB group about this subject (click icon to go there)

Other related pages

in thie e-book

(how native people raise children)

in the Learning Chapter

(of the human mind)

(for un-confusing reality from trauma response)